12 Comments
User's avatar
Cole Nielsen's avatar

I appreciate your openness sister, it is quite refreshing!

On the topic of “weaker vessel.” How do we treat more fragile things versus more sturdy or common things? A priceless vase is “weak” in the sense that it’s more fragile than a more common vase, but it’s worth compared to the other is innumerable, and we all naturally treat that vase with so much more honor, care, and dignity.

It’s not weaker as in lesser, but weaker as in a sense more valuable.

God bless!

Expand full comment
rebecca ince's avatar

Thank you, Cole! I so appreciate your example, it touched me and I'll remember that. God bless you!

Expand full comment
L. Adams's avatar

Maybe I’m in the minority with this feeling, but I firmly believe my marriage has increased the quality of my life. I am safe with this man and I’ve grown and blossomed inside marriage. Many traumas have been healed by Jesus using my husband.

I, too, identified as a misandrist(although I had no idea the word existed), and the distrust is hard to root out but I’ve had to learn that I cannot use the trauma in my past as my identity and that Jesus always wants to heal those hurts so I can change and love instead of hate. It’s hard to be vulnerable! Gah.

Expand full comment
rebecca ince's avatar

To be in that minority is a blessing and it inspires me and gives me hope to hear that you feel safe in your marriage, praise God <3 thank you for sharing your experience because every good story helps soften my heart and give me something to pray for and look forward to. I pray that I end up like you, with a husband that God uses to heal past trauma. May God continue to bless your union!!

Expand full comment
Ifeoluwa's avatar

Wow… I truly feel seen in this writing. Just moments ago, I was crying, overwhelmed by how deeply rooted my distrust for men has become. It hit me so hard that I actually said out loud, “Maybe I’ll just go through life without a man by my side.” But this piece has completely shifted something in me. It’s helped me process those feelings and reminded me of something beautiful, that God is really a girl’s dad, for real. I feel heard, protected, and held in a new way. Thank you so much for this, Rebecca 🩵

Expand full comment
rebecca ince's avatar

Ifeoluwa😭😭 I wish I could give you a hug sis, I so understand. Thank you for sharing with me, I'm deeply touched at how you've been impacted <3

Expand full comment
Chimdi Anude's avatar

This was so good! I relate to this a lot. This world will leave us bitter and full of hate if we let it but thank God we have a Father who is in the business of turning hearts of stone into hearts of flesh.

Expand full comment
Q-Benjamin's avatar

This was so relatable…thank you.

Expand full comment
Daisy's avatar

Wow, I haven't read something so completely relatable in a long time.

At the ripe age of 20, I had become a raging misandrist who constantly struggled to see the good even in my brothers in Christ. "It doesn't matter if they claim to be Christian," had (has?) become a mantra of mine, and with some cause. Christian men have the same shortcomings as nonbelieving men, and both have wronged many women, me included. However, after months of actively choosing to soften my heart, praying to love God's children like He does, and some positive examples of Godly men, I am on my way to being a reformed man-hater.

Your piece is a refreshingly sincere reminder of our freedom from hate in Christ. Thank you for sharing, as honesty about our vices is often difficult to come by in many a Christian community.

Expand full comment
amanda✨'s avatar

this was wonderfully written Rebecca.

The girlies are in full support😌❤️

Expand full comment
Leelee Benson's avatar

Thank you so much for writing this. I needed to read this. This has helped me learn how to invite God into any situation that makes me dislike men. Thank you, Rebecca.

Expand full comment
rebecca ince's avatar

thank you so much for reading Leelee <3 I'm seriously blessed to hear that this will produce good fruit in you

Expand full comment